Sara, on Love. Sling Diaries, Vol VII.
The Sling Diaries, Volume VII. A photo-documentary chronicling the art of baby wearing in the lives of families around the world. Over the course of six months, Sling Diarists will create their own Sling Diary though a series of diary entries interpreting a unique theme given to them each month.
Meet all of our Sling Diarists here.
ON LOVE
As a wedding photographer, I’ve attended many, many weddings over the past handful of years. Along with the cake, delicious food and fun dancing, listening to each couple say their vows is one of my favorite parts. I love the creativity, sincerity and thought that go into each set of vows. Whether they’re reciting age-old lines or reading from a wrinkled, handwritten notecard, each couple has put thought into those words. Although I must admit, 7 years into my own marriage causes me to listen with a bit of skepticism as well. When I hear a couple promise they’ll make each other smile every day, that they will always understand one another or that they’ll never go to bed angry I can’t help but snicker a little to myself. Maybe I’m too cynical or negative, but I like to call it “realistic”.
After 7 years and 3 kids, I know I can’t promise my husband I’ll make him happy everyday, I can’t promise I will always put his wants ahead of my own, I know we won’t always see eye to eye, we’ll go to bed angry, he’ll make me cry, I’ll make him fume, we’ll stumble and fall and say things we don’t mean.
Our kids have tested our marriage and made it stronger. They challenge us in new ways and teach us how to love in new ways. The promises we made to each other spill over onto them and seeing it all play out is enough to bring tears to my eyes.
So what can I promise after seven years? What would my vows look like at this point? I can promise that I will love him everyday, though that love might not look like hugs and kisses and thoughtful gifts. I can promise that I will allow myself to be loved by him everyday, and I will understand that that love might look like working late, or talking about hard things or taking the kids for a walk without me. I can promise that I will value our relationship above all others. I can promise that I will respect him and his hopes and dreams, even if they don’t perfectly align with mine. I can promise we won’t understand each other, but that we’ll continue to try.
Above all, I can promise that I’ll choose him and he’ll choose me; day after day, month after month. We’ll continue to stumble through life together, sometimes I’ll lead, sometimes he will. We’ll choose each other when things are tough and when things are working out, in sickness and in health, til death do us part.
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